Regrets Only!
Full-Lengths
By: L. Don Swartz
Cast: 4 M, 4 F, 1 flexible, extras
Performance Time: Approximately 60-75 minutes, 51 pgs.
COMEDY. The laughs never end when Lottie and Bernice, two cantankerous grannies, crash the wedding reception of an unsuspecting bride and groom so they can eat free food and steal rolls of toilet paper out of the restrooms. Two fire hall custodians in charge of the wedding reception find they are no match for these grumpy grannies, who heckle wedding guests, criticize everything from the wedding cupcakes to the bridesmaids’ dresses, and complain about their numerous health maladies. Audiences will love the zany, unforgettable characters in this side-splitting comedy!
Freeviews: To read play excerpts click here.
Scripts: $8.95 each
Royalty: $75.00/performance
Prompt Book: $16.00
Poster Package: $50.00 (50/pkg)
Distribution Rights: $75.00
Artwork Rights: $50.00
Play Pack: $228.00 (12 scripts for cast/crew, 1 royalty, 50 posters, 1 prompt book)
L. Don Swartz is an award-winning playwright whose plays have been performed nationally and internationally. Mr. Swartz has served as the artistic director of the Starry Night Theatre, North Tonawanda, NY, since 1982 and has directed more than 150 productions. He lives in Wheatfield, NY, with his wife, Debby, and their four children, Emily, Rosie, DJ, and Mikey.